"Maybe I'm Just Lazy" Or Maybe You're Burnt Out

Have you ever had intentions to complete a task, but physically could not bring yourself to do it? Or have you managed to get the recommended eight hours of sleep, but awake feeling unrested? Seemingly simple tasks feel like a chore to complete and you're starting to question if you're lazy and lack motivation. Instead consider this, you might be experiencing signs of burnout! 

My fabulous supervisor and I were having a mini impromptu check-in after I stopped by her office to ask a question. She shared that her partner created a sunscreen—providing me with a sample bottle of my own. After we finished imagining her future life as a lavish housewife after the sunscreen takes off (prenup included), I shared that I am considering bringing back a few skincare products of my own and felt inspired. Supporters have been asking, yet I shared how "I want to do it, but I just can't bring myself to do it. When I get home I just want to sit on the couch and watch TV. Maybe I'm lazy." I then immediately retracted that statement because, me lazy, no way! A running joke is that I have four jobs. Which is not too far fetched. I'm not lazy, as evidenced by my "four jobs", but I too am experiencing burnout. Which is interesting because I'm in what feels like a season of peace, but as a mental health professional, full-time grad-student, and a girl trying to get her life together, these last two years have challenged me emotionally and it's not uncommon for clinicians to experience emotional fatigue. 

If the description above resonates with you here are a few sign that you may be experiencing burnout and need to take a break as well.

• Is Everything Getting Under Your Skin? 

• Does Your Mind Tend To Wonder More Than Usual? 

• Do You Feel Like You're Struggling To Get Sleep Or The Sleep Quality Is Not The Best?

• Chronic headaches? 

• Do You Find Yourself Procrastinating On Major Assignments Or Tasks? 

• Have You Identified Any Somatic Symptoms or Physical Changes Such As Stomach Aches, Muscle Aches, Weight Changes, etc. 

• Are You Starting To Hate Your Job, School, Or Any Other Obligations Contributing To Your Feelings Related To Burnout? 

Burnout should not be taken lightly, instead making the necessary adjustments to rest and recuperate should take priority. As a chronic "professional student" who previously only took breaks when I had a fatal fever or was on the brink of a mental break, obtaining my Master's degree in Mental health has shown me the importance of healthy spaces that prioritize work-life balance. I am learning how to "chill" and relax, which is easier said than done. If you ever feel a sense of guilt for "doing nothing" consider that resting is technically "doing something." Also, if you fail sit down when politely asked by your body, eventually your body will take you down. Without remorse or further warning! 

A helpful tool that was shared with me by my supervisor was this Self Care Assessment. During our group supervision, we engaged in completing the self care assessment listed above. I answered honestly and shared that I am not interested in improving professionally currently, amidst other things, which was difficult to say as an individual that feels validated by their professional achievements. Overall, I found the activity life changing in seeing what I currently prioritize, want to prioritize, and what I want to spend less time on. I saved the papers and began to implement small changes to reflect my responses. Cutting things out here, adding things there. However, an event for my third job was approaching and I was put to the test. On the day of the event I shifted between the idea of going out of obligation or staying, which was my desired choice. As the time inched closer to the start of the event, I eventually stopped checking the time and decided to stay home. Do you remember when you stayed home from school and would check the time, all while considering what was happening at school related to that time? "It's 12pm, they're probably at lunch right now." I found myself doing this, until I decided to shut off my phone completely. Instead, I completed a Bob Ross puzzle and had my own solo movie night. I watched Hollywood Shuffle, The Cat in The Hat, Cinderella (with Brandy of course), The Last Dragon, and attempted to watch The Little Mermaid II. I did however stop watching halfway through because it reminded me too much of my childhood, but I then transitioned to watching One Tree Hill. I did what I wanted and when I returned to internship the next day and was asked "what did you do over the weekend" for the first time I remembered. I did what I wanted, which was nothing! 

Burnout is serious business and it's important to know the signs. Remember to rest and maintain efficient sleep hygiene routine, especially if you're a mental health provider. As the saying goes "you can't pour from an empty cup" therefore it's important to pour into yourself and take the time that you need! 

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