Book Review: Dr. Thema Bryant's Homecoming: Healing Trauma To Reclaim Your Authentic Self

 "I invite your soul to tell your heart, mind, body, and spirit, "Welcome home." -Dr. Thema Bryant

‘Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self’ is a book that you read and then reread. The first time for your brain, the second for your heart. For many individuals that have experienced trauma (whether big T or little T) intellectualizing one’s traumatic experiences can feel helpful and necessary, but also emotionally limiting. Thinking ourselves out of feeling, whether intentionally or unintentionally is the norm. 

"I invite you to consider who benefits from your insecurities, your sense of inadequacy, and your deflated dreams."

(Bryant, 2022, 209)

Healing The Fragmented Self

My internship supervisor asked me if I was in therapy and I told her that it doesn’t work for me. Ironic right, the girl in grad school to become a therapist is telling people that therapy doesn’t work for her. Well, I later explained to her that I need something with a little more kick. ”I genuinely think that I need trauma-informed therapy. I can talk you under the table and talk-therapy just isn’t a good fit for the type of work I think I need.” 

I have ghosted therapists because I struggled with communicating that journaling, solution-focused approaches, and short-term interventions are not going to push me to where I need to go.  However, ‘Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self’ showed me that I’ve been emotionally stuck and I’m ready to move forward. I’m ready to return home.

Many trauma survivors are desperately searching for that extra push. Not a push over the trauma, but a nudge through. A nudge letting them know that there’s hope on the other side. Dr. Bryant does a great job at utilizing anecdotes as a trauma survivor (without disclosing graphic or traumatic details) from her own personal experiences, and case vignettes of previous clients (minus their names or identifiable information) to provide examples and insight into how trauma impacted each individual. While no experience is identical to another, the case vignettes may offer a person healing trauma a sense of connection and belonging to cope with events that can feel isolating.

"One way to reparent yourself is by creating opportunities and cultivating spaces for your joy to be unleashed, for your joy to come alive."

(Bryant, 2022, 57)

There were many key takeaways for me especially related to perfectionism, validation seeking, learning to ask for help, people-pleasing, resentment, and what a trauma survivor should look like. 

No spoilers, but Dr. Bryant writes about a conference that she attended. At this conference a woman approached Dr. Bryant and said loosely “you don’t look like a sexual assault victim.” Dr. Bryant did not respond immediately. Instead, she allowed space for silence and the woman broke down into tears. There is healing in the silence. This account also reminded me of the saying “thank God, I don’t look like what I’ve been through.” 

Dr. Bryant is a testament to that saying and exemplifies the idea that although an individual may have experienced heinous, cruel, frighting, isolating, and unjust acts, that doesn’t define who they are or what they can become. Dr. Bryant, while extremely knowledgeable and a trauma survivor herself, rarely uses psychological jargon to present information within Homecoming. The book is in “plain ol’ English”, meaning the language and tone offers an inclusive approach for readers of various ages and educational backgrounds. Homecoming preaches, but refrains from being preachy. 

"If your home was joyless, you may be uncomfortable with play and leisure."

(Bryant, 2022, 57)

Whether an individual is on a journey of healing post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) or complex post traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD, ‘Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self’ discusses how to identify disconnection from one’s self (mind, body, and spirit) due to trauma and different scenarios that can inflict trauma onto the individual, without being overtly graphic. Also, Dr.Bryant discusses toxic workplace trauma, oppression based trauma, losses, and breakup and divorce. 

‘Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self’ is less about processing trauma immediately or reading about others oversharing trauma as seen in other books. Instead, Homecoming serves as the introduction to identifying (if applicable) your trauma and how your trauma may impact your mind, body, and spirit. As well as information to support the reader on their journey home to themselves amidst disconnection. 

During the Societal Trauma segment of my Trauma and the Contemporary Family course my prof. shared the video You Can Heal Intergenerational Trauma TedxTalk with the class. Inspired, at a loss for words, dignified, validated, and proud is how I felt after completing the video and finishing the novel. Within the video Dr.Bryant spoke with such conviction and strength that even the most insecure individual would feel born-anew with each word. My professor knew that I was reading Dr.Bryant's book prior to watching the video and during group supervision she asked for my thoughts on the video. "Thema Bryant lives what she teaches (and preaches) and it was nice to put a face to the information."

This book will spark transformation and was validating in many ways. Homecoming put language to the feelings that I struggled to name for myself and ideas that I did not have the knowledge to identify personally. Bryant knows what to say and when to say it. I tend to speed read but at one point, to paraphrase, Bryant writes that it's not a race, slow down and feel what you are reading. This was in the section about perfectionism and I realized that even with an absence of competitors I am still competing. 

Within the course we are also currently reading In an Unspoken Voice: How the Body Releases Trauma and Restores Goodness and Waking The Tiger Healing Trauma is also another renowned trauma related book by Peter A. Levine. Within the Unspoken Voice, Levine discusses how a client experienced a rather cathartic release of trauma, one where they imagined themselves as a tiger. When engaging in trauma work, Levine expresses that it's important to avoid a retraumatization in therapy of the the client. Dr.Bryant's novel is great for working through and identifying trauma, while Levine's book Unspoken Voice does well at addressing how to talk about trauma in therapy. While healing trauma from the client's perspective, its advised to avoid retraumatizing yourself. Retraumatizing yourself can look like engaging in uninformed trauma work. To avoid retraumatizing yourself avoid moving too fast too soon. Avoid tapping into memories and events without having the coping skills or grounding skills to recenter yourself before, during, and after. Also, establish a self care plan and consult with a trauma-informed professional while engaging in trauma related work and reliving past trauma. 

The Homecoming Podcast with Dr. Thema

I finished ‘Homecoming: Healing Trauma to Reclaim Your Authentic Self’ and wanted more of Dr. Thema Bryant. She mentioned her podcast in the beginning and end of the novel and I decided to take a listen. I intentionally sat in the sauna for the duration of an episode, which was about 40 minutes. I was willing to cook to heal my trauma. Dr. Bryant's voice is slow, melodic, serene, and centering. I listened to three episodes in one gym visit. As a therapist-in-training I admire the work and genius that is Dr. Thema Bryant. As an individual overcoming childhood trauma, in finding Dr.Bryant I found the nexus and missing component to heal trauma and invite my soul to tell my heart, mind, body, and spirit, "Welcome home.